Monday, March 04, 2013
New views on booze
So, I mentioned previously that Jason and I were giving up booze starting Jan 1 and continuing through (at least) March 2.
Here we are on day 62 and we have pretty much been booze free all year. It hasn't been nearly as hard as we expected. It has also helped us make smarter choices in so many areas of our lives. We never knew how many small (but important) things we affected by alcohol. We've been noticing and remarking about how we really like life without booze. What a concept for two Yankee-born kids!
Well, we did slip and have some drinks on my birthday and it was a HUGE mistake and we didn't even drink that much! It was like this:
We were having an absolutely lovely day. We ran some errands. Planted some daffodils, went to the library to look at the ducks and geese. I even saw a rainbow! We were on day 47 without a drop of alcohol and feeling really good and thought, "Hey, today's a special day, let's celebrate! Let's have some beers cuz that's how WE do it!" So we wrapped up all of our chores and got a big beer and a six pack of our favorite local craft beer (Widmer Drop Top Amber Ale). We shared the big beer in our frosty mugs that we hadn't seen in well over a month. It was DELICIOUS! We gave a toast, finished that beer and proceeded to beer #2. This is where the judgement went to shit and bad decisions galore began.
We decided that cooking the nice shrimp and veggies, as we had planned, would be no fun and we should go to Newport Bay Restaurant for yum food (it was disgusting) and cold beers (they weren't) and a Moroccan liquor drink for Jason (sugared coffee heart burn).
By the end of a meal that I don't remember, we were getting angry with the waiter because the dessert we ordered (we never have dessert) was inedible and he took our card and forgot to charge it so we had to remind him to take our money! I was getting pissed and feeling poisoned. I wanted to go HOME! Things were spinning for me.
Alcohol count by this point (over a 4 hour period):
3 beers for Sarah
4 beers and one coffee drink for Jason.
As soon as we got home, we passed out -- which was like 8pm (more like 9pm for me because I was spinning too much to close my eyes). We both felt sick, hot, sweaty, couldn't sleep. The cat was sleep torturing me and I was fighting him. We were all MISERABLE. What started out a fabulous day turned into the worst night of all year!
We were hung over the next day but had yoga at 10am. Neither one of us really felt like going, but alcohol ruined my birthday and we weren't going to let it take away another thing that we love, that makes us feel good. So we went to yoga. Later, we also traversed the entire city to visit our friend in Gresham. We gave her the remaining 3 beers from the six pack and vowed NEVER AGAIN.
Skip ahead to yesterday. We went to an all day silent retreat at Yoga Hillsboro. It was # 5 for us and the best one yet. It's getting easier every time and with a beginner's eye, it's different every time. We wrapped it up and felt great. Went home and then the poor choices went something like this:
Let's go get a fish sandwich from Burgerville > yeah that's great! > you wanna get one big beer and split it - I feel pretty good about drinking just one beer > sure but if we're going to have beer, we should go to Chipotle because that shit tastes good with a beer > (at beer store) well maybe we should get one pint each > split a burrito from Chipotle (best choice all night) > drank one pint each > passed out super early out, sweaty, sick, fighting with cat all night, grumpy in the morning.
Moral of this story - I'm starting to trust that I do not want alcohol in my life anymore. Not to celebrate, not to have "just one", not ever. I'm making this entry to remind myself how much I don't appreciate the effects of alcohol on my body. It influences my choices in a bad way and causes a domino effect of consequences. I don't get to "be" with my husband the way that I want to and the way that makes me feel good. Passed out sweaty restless sleep makes for bad nights and worse next days.
Of the last 62 days, the two days that I drank alcohol were the worst. Hands down. No question.
It's a beautiful day today so I'm going to run run run and purge myself of this toxicity.