Wednesday, March 27, 2013

A poem from a friend


By Danna Faulds

There is no controlling life.

Try corralling a lightning bolt,

containing a tornado. Dam a

stream and it will create a new

channel. Resist, and the tide

will sweep you off your feet.

Allow, and grace will carry

you to higher ground. The only

safety lies in letting it all in –

the wild and the weak; fear,

fantasies, failures and success.

When loss rips off the doors of

the heart, or sadness veils your

vision with despair, practice

becomes simply bearing the truth.

In the choice to let go of your

known way of being, the whole

world is revealed to your new eyes.

My yoga instructor and dear friend shared this poem with me tonight.

He could tell things were feeling a bit heavy in my world.

I'm so grateful for small wonders.

Monday, March 25, 2013

Gnome on Strike

Spring-breakers are out in full force and this little guy pretty much sums up how I'm feeling.

Spring is here and I'm ready to sit back and enjoy it!!

I did take a few days off last week to spend time with my mom while she was visiting for her Spring Break. It was a lovely week. I truly felt like I was on a mini Spring Break.

Now back to work. Ugh.

Gnome on Strike!

Friday, March 15, 2013

Nia White Belt June 2013

Watch out Nia - here I come! I'm so excited to announce that I've signed up for the Nia White Belt week-long intensive training in June! I'm crazy excited! This will definitely be a journey and a challenge but I can't wait! This will take all of the new things I've learned about myself, my life, my body and my relationships to a whole other level.

The best thing about it - I'll be able to TEACH Nia once I've completed the White Belt Training! You can take classes from me in my living room or anywhere! I think the beach would be a sweet place to dance :-)

This is a video of the graduation of the most recent White Belt Training that Laurie did (she'll be my trainer in June). It looks like SO MUCH FUN!!!

Can't wait to have one of those long white sash belts of my own! (And some of those awesome flare pants!)

Thursday, March 07, 2013

My Guys

I love these guys so much!! Jason's office is like their "man cave."

Oh Crash...don't look so excited!

Monday, March 04, 2013

New views on booze

So, I mentioned previously that Jason and I were giving up booze starting Jan 1 and continuing through (at least) March 2.

60 days.

Here we are on day 62 and we have pretty much been booze free all year. It hasn't been nearly as hard as we expected. It has also helped us make smarter choices in so many areas of our lives. We never knew how many small (but important) things we affected by alcohol. We've been noticing and remarking about how we really like life without booze. What a concept for two Yankee-born kids!

Well, we did slip and have some drinks on my birthday and it was a HUGE mistake and we didn't even drink that much! It was like this:

We were having an absolutely lovely day. We ran some errands. Planted some daffodils, went to the library to look at the ducks and geese. I even saw a rainbow! We were on day 47 without a drop of alcohol and feeling really good and thought, "Hey, today's a special day, let's celebrate! Let's have some beers cuz that's how WE do it!" So we wrapped up all of our chores and got a big beer and a six pack of our favorite local craft beer (Widmer Drop Top Amber Ale). We shared the big beer in our frosty mugs that we hadn't seen in well over a month. It was DELICIOUS! We gave a toast, finished that beer and proceeded to beer #2. This is where the judgement went to shit and bad decisions galore began.

We decided that cooking the nice shrimp and veggies, as we had planned, would be no fun and we should go to Newport Bay Restaurant for yum food (it was disgusting) and cold beers (they weren't) and a Moroccan liquor drink for Jason (sugared coffee heart burn).

By the end of a meal that I don't remember, we were getting angry with the waiter because the dessert we ordered (we never have dessert) was inedible and he took our card and forgot to charge it so we had to remind him to take our money! I was getting pissed and feeling poisoned. I wanted to go HOME! Things were spinning for me.

Alcohol count by this point (over a 4 hour period):
3 beers for Sarah
4 beers and one coffee drink for Jason.

As soon as we got home, we passed out -- which was like 8pm (more like 9pm for me because I was spinning too much to close my eyes). We both felt sick, hot, sweaty, couldn't sleep. The cat was sleep torturing me and I was fighting him. We were all MISERABLE. What started out a fabulous day turned into the worst night of all year!

We were hung over the next day but had yoga at 10am. Neither one of us really felt like going, but alcohol ruined my birthday and we weren't going to let it take away another thing that we love, that makes us feel good. So we went to yoga. Later, we also traversed the entire city to visit our friend in Gresham. We gave her the remaining 3 beers from the six pack and vowed NEVER AGAIN.

Skip ahead to yesterday. We went to an all day silent retreat at Yoga Hillsboro. It was # 5 for us and the best one yet. It's getting easier every time and with a beginner's eye, it's different every time. We wrapped it up and felt great. Went home and then the poor choices went something like this:

Let's go get a fish sandwich from Burgerville > yeah that's great! > you wanna get one big beer and split it - I feel pretty good about drinking just one beer > sure but if we're going to have beer, we should go to Chipotle because that shit tastes good with a beer > (at beer store) well maybe we should get one pint each > split a burrito from Chipotle (best choice all night) > drank one pint each > passed out super early out, sweaty, sick, fighting with cat all night, grumpy in the morning.

Moral of this story - I'm starting to trust that I do not want alcohol in my life anymore. Not to celebrate, not to have "just one", not ever. I'm making this entry to remind myself how much I don't appreciate the effects of alcohol on my body. It influences my choices in a bad way and causes a domino effect of consequences. I don't get to "be" with my husband the way that I want to and the way that makes me feel good. Passed out sweaty restless sleep makes for bad nights and worse next days.

Of the last 62 days, the two days that I drank alcohol were the worst. Hands down. No question.

It's a beautiful day today so I'm going to run run run and purge myself of this toxicity.

Notice that!

Friday, March 01, 2013

Like Riding a Snail

(I saw this guy and thought "Silly gnome! You'll never get anywhere riding a snail!" So he came home with me and joined the garden buddies.)

It's taken a while but we woke up today and felt it. Spring is on its way! The air feels lighter, the sun is brighter earlier and longer. The birds and squirrels are starting to emerge and uncover hidden treasures from pre-winter foraging.

Experiencing the closing in of fall and then the oppressive dismal winter weather makes me so much more appreciative and understanding of the seasons. I spent so many years in southern states where it was one long hot season with a nip of seasonal weather here and there. Shorts on Christmas was not uncommon. Sporadic torrential down pour was our "rainy" season. Blue Northers brought sleet and frozen rain at any time of the year.

These days I get so excited to see the first blooms of spring. Here, that would be the crocus. I don't have any of these in my yard yet, but they are definitely next on the list. They are the official signal to me that Spring is on the way! And they are SO dang cute!

This year I snagged some daffodils (not called jonquils here, mom) and a few grape hyacinths on sale to add to the bulb garden. Daffodils are neck and neck with crocus for first bloom but I have seen crocus come up through'd say they win...tulips and hyacinths are right behind.

I'm so excited to be sitting here with the windows open, in a short sleeve shirt, light pants and no wool socks!  The birds are chirping. Crash and Derville are sniffing up all the sniffs through the window screens. It's a really lovely day and the sun isn't actually even shining! I'll take whatever we can have for one day.

It was like riding a snail, but we made it through the  winter and I think we did it with more grace than ever since we moved to Oregon.

I think we're finally getting the hang of this life.